Countless times I have wondered about this, but I just can not get it. Can you tell me what the profit is of those books about autism making statements about what someone with autism should be capable of and the things that are likely to to be reached by autists?
One example is a piece of text I read in a book written by a so called autism professional. When speaking about a marriage of two people with autism, it was highlighted that the conversation between those two happy autists existed of sharing thoughts on computer programming software. What use is it to tell the world that those two people are just so happy sharing stories about computer programming software together? I think this is cumiliating. Many NT couples talk the same way and even about more nonsens things. Why does this have to be highlighted? I think this is discriminating. What do people want to tell us by telling us this story?
And what about all those lists of remarks of the do's and the don't s of people with autism. 'Most people with autism are likely to stay alone all their life, because they can not find a partner for life due to their lack of social skills'. This is wrong I guess. Writing this only hightlights the differences between the rest of the world and people with autism. It is also very hurtful for all people with autism to be jugded that way.
Most of these nonsens are written by professionals, happily married or at least in a relationship and earning lots of money. Let they mind their own business.
I do not need another label on my forehead like the Zoo: please do not feed them.
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- Aspie Bird
- Female,40+, Europe tells about her life with autism. About the fun of life and how I deal with autism. Regular Blog updates.There are many disabilities and autism is just one of them. Many many people struggle with their lives without being diagnosed with something, you know... It all about the way you deal with things.
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3 comments:
And three hundred years ago the happily married couple may well have been discussing the merits of Jethro Tull's new fangled seed drill or further back in Babylonian times whether it was worth investing in a shaduf :)
Hello Aspie
It seems that you are reading a book written by people who don't understand people unlike themselfs. Their minds cannot comprihend the fact that humanbeings are by choice living alone or choose to wait to find someone to fit lifestyle. That people choose this over a relationship in which you can feel more lonely than live on your own.
By putting labels on the 'strangers/loners' like 'unable to have a relationship', they think that they have more grip on the strangers/loners.
But hey, I don't understand complaining husbands and wives, So the lack of understanding is quite mutual.
greetings, G. (guest of 22nd april)
After my daughter got her autism diagnosis I read some books that were like this. I thought it was my duty as a parent (an NT parent, therefore cluless about this) to educate myself on what the preofessionals thought.
But my God those are a depressing read. The more I read, the worse I felt about my daughter's prospects for a happy adult life.They do pathologize absolutely everything. Even stuff that looked positve to me like echolalia and a good memory they managed to pathologize. And they weren't helping me understand her point of view.
So I put down those books and decided to read books by people with first hand knowledge like Temple Grandin and Daniel Tamment, and of course bloggers like yourself. That made all the difference. Where the autism professionals saw just bleak loneliness, dysfunction and pathology, these books and blogs gave me real insight and a more upbeat perspective. Besides, it was starting to tick me off that the things my NT husband and I do (like talk shop) was suddenly pathologized if a couple on the autism spectrum did it. And echolalia? Hollywood just calls that "learning your lines". It's another thing that is absolutely positive in the right context.
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